pregnancy, Uncategorized

“C-Section or Not; You are a Mother”

 

She Cried Today.

She cried because her pregnancy journey will end with a Caesarean section (C-section).

She cried because pregnancy to her that means she didn’t earn her baby

She cried because she felt she wasn’t a ‘real’ mother/woman.

She cried because she will not be able to labor her baby into the world.

She cried because she was embarrassed to tell her husband.

She cried because to her – she has failed.

My heart hurt for this 1st time mother.  This mother who has planned from the 1st positive pregnancy test for this baby, prayed for this baby, dreamed about her pregnancy and mentally prepared for the birth of her baby.

My heart hurt because she could not see there is more than one road to a healthy baby.

She Cried Today

I spent time with her. I talked with her. I wanted my words to acknowledge her feeling and empower her to own her birth story.

I wanted  her to know :

She is a Mother

She is a Woman

She has not failed but is winning and has won.

She has carried this child for almost 40 weeks; who she loves without ever meeting. She has nurtured this child in utero doing everything right to set the stage to welcome her little one into the world.  Her desire is to have the perfect pregnancy journey, which to her is to have a vaginal delivery.

She Cried Today

She left her office visit with a look of resignation and anxiousness in her eyes.

I will see her once more before her scheduled C-section. I will speak with her, comfort her, encourage her to express her feelings, hopes, and thoughts.

In my mind and heart:

My hope , my prayer is that she will always know:

The journey of pregnancy and parenting may not always be linear. That she will learn to expect the unexpected, that plans change.

Regardless of how her birth story unfolds ; that she will remember:

She is a Mother

She is a Woman

She is Strong

Her name is Mama

Her Baby = Love

Healthy Mom/Healthy Baby

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Mary Echols, RN , BSN, MSN

Wife/Mother/ Registered Nurse/ “Champion of All Pregnant Women”

Contact Mary @ theadventuresofpregnancy@yahoo.com

 

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family, Uncategorized

Wednesday’s with the Waltons

“Introducing the Walton’s.  The Walton’s will be sharing their adventures of 2 quirky no-nonsense parents and 5 adorable children; one who is a real princess. Stop by on Wednesday to read about their adventures on parenting, pregnancy and raising 5 children”

*Disclaimer- as a mother of 1- I may disagree with some of her statements image

 

Being a full time working mother of 5 children, I have very little empathy for parents who complain about their hectic, chaotic lives with 1 or 2 children. Please, come to my house with 4 active boys and a girl who truly believes she is a princess.

Enter the Walton house where 5 lovely, rambunctious children will greet you at the door with their laughter, if you’re lucky, or their screams of madness if you come on a bad day. But picture our day at 6am when the kids are waking up, slowly and begrudgingly.  The princess somehow found her way to my bed and is stretched out the long way across my bed looking like a cat in a window bathing in sunlight.

In my own bathroom, I have to maneuver around kids and husband. Am I irritated? Yes. Yes I am.  But let me point out that the boys have a bathroom of their own.  I don’t want 10 toothbrushes, 3 tubes of toothpaste with no tops and toothpaste residue on my counter, sinks and mirror! Can I scream on the inside?  The princess is running away from me trying to hide her comb because “combs are mean.”  She starts crying because, “This is torture! I’m just a kid!” and her daddy is the hero because he patiently holds her hand through this process and all I can do is roll my eyes and allow another internal scream.

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I’m getting lunches, helping kids find matching socks in our version of Mount Rushmore of Lost Socks. I have a glimmer of hope that the other matching pair will be found somehow, somewhere.  I swear my kids who normally can’t sit still are moving like snails stuck in molasses.  And it’s only 6:25am.  My husband now has the kids for school. And I can relax and go to work.

Homework, dinner and bedtime can be a night that never ends. The kids have chores after dinner and no matter how long they have had this job, every night they act like it’s brand new to them.  One turns the vacuum on but then stands there for 10 minutes hoping we’re not paying attention and then turns the vacuum off.  Yes, son, you need to move the vacuum around to pick up the food that has fallen on the floor.  Another son, moves things around on the dining table and when asked if the table is wiped says, “yes.”  Why is there still food on the table?  The reply, “no there isn’t.” Son, I’m looking right at it!  ALL this has to be wiped clean.

Taking a shower is a battle of wills, which I refuse to let them win. Being the first one to take a shower is like asking them to pull out their fingernails.  Why? Why is it a punishment to be the first one to take a shower?!  At 8pm, I excitedly tell them “Bedtime!” I’ve even danced a jig while saying it.  But the night doesn’t end like a fairy tale.  I can still hear laughter, talking and the pitter patter of feet running upstairs.  A friendly, “Go to sleep, you have school tomorrow,” comes out my mouth.  Then a more stern, “GO TO BED!”  After an hour, I have to strain and hold my tongue with all the power I can muster not to scream, colorful expletive words young children should not hear.   And the day starts over at 6am the next day like a modern day Groundhog’s Day.

So parents of 1 or 2 children, this is a typical day for me, a full time working mother of 5 children. If I don’t say or offer to help out or show you empathy like you thought I might, it’s because I have 5, FIVE children ages 5 to 12 years.  Let me say it again.  FIVE.

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Contact Kristine Walton @ kd_2426@hotmail.com

Kristine Walton: Wife /Registered Nurse/Mother of 5